Success : This is an attitude, I have succeeded in everything I have undertaken. I visualize, I plan, and make it happen. It may not always end up how I first see it, but I have learned to let things evolve and become what they want to be. If I foster an idea and put forth the effort , find resources, plan and adjust, refine, my ventures always come to fruition. I take the same positive attitude when I am ready to ramp a certain aspect up of an existing project. I am sure I have some peter out or completely implode, but I choose to not give them the energy they certainly don’t deserve. On to bigger and better things. Learn what you can from it and move on, never giving up. I remember hearing that Henry Ford filed for bankruptcy just before his great Model T came to fruition.
I think we feel better when we look better any way. The point I want to make to you is that you need to take your success, your level of play seriously. You need to take seriously how you portray your image to everyone. Its fine to say you don’t care what any one thinks of you and really you shouldn’t especially if you know you are putting forth your best effort.
The idea that I want you to grasp on to is that if you value yourself worth so will others. When you wake up in the morning and you look in the mirror and say I dont feel like shaving, putting on any make-up, combing my hair, really I dont feel like putting any effort into myself, then how do you expect anyone else to put any effort into you either.
It’s funny, if I am sick I typically put more effort into my appearance and I feel a little better. I find when I show up to work, even if it’s in my back yard, I have a dress and nice shoes on, I perform better, I get more done. Seriously if you think about it, you never know who you are going to run into at Publix or the gas station. The last thing you want to do is be in your Walmart sweatpants and end up pumping gas next to Mrs Rockefeller who you just gave a $10,000 proposal to. What will she think? She may think she’s not sure she hired the right person.
On the other end of the spectrum, dont over do it. dressing like a hoochie mama sends all the wrong messages. When you dress like a hooch it shows you value your sexuality more than your ability to produce good work. Unless that’s what your selling, sex, then dont dress like a hooker please. Skirts no more than 4″ above your knee, absolutely no platform any kind of shoe, no boobs popping out.
Take pride in your appearance, that’s the easiest place to start. Get a hair cut, shave daily, get some new shoes, please!!! Your professional appearance sets a tone for your day, for your attitude and for your path in life. I always say act as if you were already successful in your career, I mean dress like it too, its a great place to start going better places.
The simplest way to take control of your life is to take responsibility for everything that happens to you.
If you find yourself saying things along the lines of “Bob is always getting the good projects at work and my boss never gives them to me.” You are making excuses for your own behavior. Turn your language around. “What can I do to show my boss I deserve the best projects, how can I earn his respect…”
The reality is no one is doing anything to you . This is only your own perception. Take control of your life. I would challenge you to change Any statement you make to blame someone else to blaming yourself.
I can’t loose weight because my wife brings home junk food from the store. (Excuse and blame)
I am doing the grocery shopping at least once a month and buying healthy snacks. (Taking ownership and responsibility)
Wasn’t that simple? I can tell you simple is not always easy. Practice practice practice the language you use. Stop yourself and make the correction on the spot.
Are you going after big game or are you starving yourself on the easy pickins. “Newt Gingrich was the one that originally came up with this question. A lion is more than capable of killing and eating field mice. The problem with this is the caloric energy required to catch a field mouse is more than the caloric content gained from eating the field mouse. If the lion would eat field mice all day, then it would eventually die of starvation. A lion needs to hunt big animals like antelopes to survive. It takes more time and energy to take down an antelope, but it offers a feast for the entire pride” (http://brandongaille.com/blogging-questions/).
When we start out we want the big game, but not sure how to get it, we go for the field mice every time. from my experience unless you are super blessed and lucky, this is how it has to start. I look at it as practice runs for the real race.
At some point though you have to stop or you will starve.
1: Stop waiting for them to come to you. Go out and find who you need to hunt. start at the top and work your way back. be sure this target is part of what will get you to your goals and serve you best in the long run.
2. Just cant give up the little guys? Hire someone to handle them with you. Just be sure what they bring in will cover the expense of payroll. I hired a draftsman to take on the little additions and remodels that come through, they more than cover his salary and now he can help me with the production work that goes into serving our larger clients more efficiently. And I have to say some of those field mice can become antelope.
3. At some point you will have to let those mice go and say “no, thank you” stick to the idea the those big fish are circling you now and you dont need any catfish muddying the waters.
When defining success make sure your ladder is leaning against the right building
This goes back to having practiced writing down your goals and being clear on what you really want out of your life.
Be in the practice of evaluating what you spend your time and money on. It is going toward what your biggest goal is?
I’m terrible at this most of the time, simply because I get decision weary, tired and hungry with running our design firm full time, 2 kids and a husband and I have a life I enjoy leading as well. This blog for instance takes time and effort to write and build.
What is at the top of my building is freedom, time and financial and creating a way to serve others.
I say to be in practice because I don’t know a single person who is perfect at getting what they want the first time around. I believe we have to practice at being better people. Part of that is to reevaluate what building our ladder is leaning against.
So the saying goes something like : Attract What you Expect; Reflect What You Desire; Become what You Respect and Mirror What you Admire.
I know this may be over simplified, but the reality of how we live our lives truly gets in the way of us spending a ton of time to reflect and create new habits. I do my best to find straight forward simple ideas to follow that I can rattle off to myself when I need to.
My son just walked in to the office and asked what I was doing and what that quote meant. I stuck with the last piece of the quote… mirror what you admire.
One: I try to think to myself “What would Jesus do in this situation and then what would Barbara Corcoran do (business woman I admire).” I shoot for a balance, but look to those I admire for guidance and mirror there actions, or what I believe would be their actions.
Two: Follow this simple rule, always dress one level up from those you will be around. We figured this out during our art show days. There is a level of perceived value you can achieve with how you present yourself to the world. People will value you and your work more if you actually look the part, as though you look like you value yourself. No yoga pants or sweat pants outside of your house. I dont care how comfortable they are.
Three: Act as if …. Act as if you already are Barbara Corcoran, Steve Jobbs, or anyone in your field that you admire. Act like them (assuming they are respectful) do what they do, Barbara said she would give her self a pep talk before she went into a meeting. Positive self talk is a great habit to embrace.
1,2,3… You’re on the road!